How To Rekindle the Passion in Your Marriage

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You and your spouse probably could not keep your hands off each other when you first got married. Yet as you settled into life together, you may have noticed yourselves drifting apart. With your busy schedules, it may be hard to find time for romance.

You do not have to spend the rest of your life in a passionless marriage. Here are some ways to rekindle your relationship with your spouse.

1. Try New Activities

Do you remember how much fun you had when you and your spouse first started dating? You probably enjoyed trying unique restaurants or going on adventures together. You can relive some of that magic by finding new activities to do together as a couple. Consider seeing a live musical or booking a fun Hawaii cruise.

2. Go Back to the Beginning

To truly revive the spark that was present at the beginning of your relationship, you could also try some of the activities that you did on your early dates. This should remind you of the reasons you fell in love with your partner. Even just looking at old photos or reminiscing about old times should help you get closer to your spouse.

3. Improve Sexual Chemistry

 Passionate sex is important for any marriage. To rekindle things in the bedroom, start with small steps such as hugging and holding hands. These minor moments of intimacy can help your body release oxytocin , a hormone associated with orgasms. Physical affection can also make you feel less stressed, which, in turn, can make you readier for love-making.

Next, both you and your spouse should agree to make sex a priority. Pick a day and time for intimacy and avoid talking about stressors such as work or kids. Instead, set the mood with a light dinner and your favorite music.

Once you both climb into bed, allow the sexual tension to build. Share your fantasies with each other and go slowly during foreplay. Your brains will experience increased pleasure as they anticipate the upcoming intercourse.   

You should also try experimenting with each other during the sex. Use the intercourse as a way to learn what turns on your partner. Similarly, alternating between erotic sex and gentler, more intimate intercourse can break up your routine.

Try having sex at different times of day, as well. If you wait until nighttime, you or your spouse may be too tired for intimacy. Consider sneaking into the bedroom on a Saturday afternoon or during your lunch hour.

4. Talk to Each Other

You likely have inane conversations with your spouse every day. However, the two of you should take a few minutes each day to have a more personal conversation. Find out how your spouse is doing and be honest to each other about your feelings. Instead of assuming that your spouse does not appreciate you, talk to him or her and find out exactly why he or she is acting a certain way. You may find out that the truth is a lot more benign than what was in your mind.

Even when you do discuss more mundane items, you can spice things up by using the pet names you have for each other. A short name of affection such as “hon” or “babe” can also do the trick.  

5. Love Yourself

You cannot be passionate with your spouse if you are upset about your own life. Replenish yourself outside of your marriage by taking a class or setting some personal goals. This should make you more receptive to love from your spouse. You may also want to spend some time away from your spouse, whether that means visiting your parents or taking a trip with friends. This will give you a chance to miss your spouse and reflect on your relationship.

A passionless marriage can be miserable and leave you thinking about divorce. Following the above steps should help you rekindle the romance in your relationship so the two of you can fall in love all over again.

You and your spouse probably could not keep your hands off each other when you first got married. Yet as you settled into life together, you may have noticed yourselves drifting apart. With your busy schedules, it may be hard to find time for romance.

You do not have to spend the rest of your life in a passionless marriage. Here are some ways to rekindle your relationship with your spouse.

1. Try New Activities

Do you remember how much fun you had when you and your spouse first started dating? You probably enjoyed trying unique restaurants or going on adventures together. You can relive some of that magic by finding new activities to do together as a couple. Consider seeing a live musical or booking a fun Hawaii cruise.

2. Go Back to the Beginning

To truly revive the spark that was present at the beginning of your relationship, you could also try some of the activities that you did on your early dates. This should remind you of the reasons you fell in love with your partner. Even just looking at old photos or reminiscing about old times should help you get closer to your spouse.

3. Improve Sexual Chemistry

 Passionate sex is important for any marriage. To rekindle things in the bedroom, start with small steps such as hugging and holding hands. These minor moments of intimacy can help your body release oxytocin , a hormone associated with orgasms. Physical affection can also make you feel less stressed, which, in turn, can make you readier for love-making.

Next, both you and your spouse should agree to make sex a priority. Pick a day and time for intimacy and avoid talking about stressors such as work or kids. Instead, set the mood with a light dinner and your favorite music.

Once you both climb into bed, allow the sexual tension to build. Share your fantasies with each other and go slowly during foreplay. Your brains will experience increased pleasure as they anticipate the upcoming intercourse.   

You should also try experimenting with each other during the sex. Use the intercourse as a way to learn what turns on your partner. Similarly, alternating between erotic sex and gentler, more intimate intercourse can break up your routine.

Try having sex at different times of day, as well. If you wait until nighttime, you or your spouse may be too tired for intimacy. Consider sneaking into the bedroom on a Saturday afternoon or during your lunch hour.

4. Talk to Each Other

You likely have inane conversations with your spouse every day. However, the two of you should take a few minutes each day to have a more personal conversation. Find out how your spouse is doing and be honest to each other about your feelings. Instead of assuming that your spouse does not appreciate you, talk to him or her and find out exactly why he or she is acting a certain way. You may find out that the truth is a lot more benign than what was in your mind.

Even when you do discuss more mundane items, you can spice things up by using the pet names you have for each other. A short name of affection such as “hon” or “babe” can also do the trick.  

5. Love Yourself

You cannot be passionate with your spouse if you are upset about your own life. Replenish yourself outside of your marriage by taking a class or setting some personal goals. This should make you more receptive to love from your spouse. You may also want to spend some time away from your spouse, whether that means visiting your parents or taking a trip with friends. This will give you a chance to miss your spouse and reflect on your relationship.

A passionless marriage can be miserable and leave you thinking about divorce. Following the above steps should help you rekindle the romance in your relationship so the two of you can fall in love all over again.